Meant to Fly

I do so love chatting with strangers.  Late yesterday I was walking my dog and caught up with a lovely woman with enchanting tattoos and a fabulous skirt.


Me:  "I like your wings and your bird."  She had wings on the outside of her ankles and a bird rounding her neck.

Lovely woman:  "Thank you...but they don't make me walk any faster."

Me:  "That's because you were meant to fly."

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Squawkin'

I feel like a mother hen hovering over my brood...of chickens.  We never hear them from inside the house.  Never.  Well, except for that one hen we had that cock-a-doodle-doo'd and outed himself as a rooster.  But since then, never. 

But today I could totally hear Fuzzy from inside our house.  I had to go outside to look.  Twice! 

Now our hens haven't started laying yet, but we've been impatiently expecting that to start any time now.  And I'm thinking that maybe, just maybe, Fuzzy feels somethin' a comin'.  Somethin' that without any explanation must feel quite terribly wrong indeed.

Yup, if I were Fuzzy I'd be making those same squawky sounds...without a doubt.


In fact, I'm pretty sure I did make those same squawky sounds about 15 and 19 years ago....

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Front Porch Friend

There's a toad that lives on our porch.  I walk out at night to get our cats in (coyotes have been hanging in our hood lately) and there's always a toad right there.  It's a super friendly toad in that I'll-tolerate-you-picking-me-up-and-I'll-pee-just-as-a-matter-of-routine kind of way.  And there must be some great eatin' 'round these parts because over the last month that toad has gone from small to medium to BIG. 

I brought this up to my family and went on and on about my amazement.  And they were utterly and completely unimpressed.


Family member:  "There are three different toads.  A small one, a medium one, and a big one."

Me:  "Oh."

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Menopause and Memory

Little guy:  "Hey, mom, are you looking forward to menopause?"

Me:  "YES!!!"

Little guy:  "Oh.  But that's when you get hot flashes."

Me:  "What were you expecting me to say?"

Little guy:  "I thought you'd say, 'no'."


Rats!  He was disappointed.


Me:  "Did you want me to say, 'no'?"

Little guy:  "I had a good joke to tell you if you had."

Me:  "Oh...well then, no."

Little guy:  "Too late.  I forgot the joke."


Rats!  Now I'm disappointed.

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The Super Duper Never-Ending Hug

I feel pretty darn lucky that my kids, at fifteen and nineteen, are still super snuggly.  While a lot of hugs are motivated by their wanting me to cook something or to prove HOW MUCH BIGGER they are than their wee little mom, sometimes hugs are purely about love.

Or so I thought last night until the hug went on just a little too long (not that I'm complaining).


Me:  "Are you playing a video game while you're hugging me?"

Little guy:  "Yup."


And that hug kept going and going.  Bliss...

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Cookie Love

I've always rather liked rewards.  You know, simple stuff like crossing things off of a "to do" list, the few coins I find in the washing machine after doing a load of the family's laundry, and hugs.  Hugs are always good.  But lately the main reward I've been wanting is cookies.

Yes, I'm Kali...and I've got a problem.  A cookie problem.

It seems whenever I eat my lunch or dinner, my tastebuds collaborate with my brain and they all say, "We deserve a cookie!"

So do I indulge them with a fabulous chocolate chip cookie?

Do I present them with a whimsically decorated sugar cookie?

Do I give them a meticulously criss-crossed peanut butter cookie?

Nope, nope, nope!


No...because they're stuck with me they get an amazing gluten free ginger snap cookie...or five.

And they are SO happy!

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All Wild and Curly

This morning I woke up to the most amazing bed head I think I've ever had.  Truly, I rather looked like Medusa...on a bad snake hair kind of day.

Now what's nice about my mornings is that I get to spend them alone.  Well, not counting the dogs and cats.  So my family is spared the sight of morning me.  But on the rare occasion that one of them does pop out into the living room before the sun comes up, well, I shout out a preemptive "I'm pretty!!!"

You know, in case they aren't able to see through my wild exterior and all.

 Exhibit A...Insert "I'm pretty!!!" here.

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