Saturday, August 31, 2013

Man's Best Friend...a Dog...or a Mog...or a Dan...or a....

Perhaps it's the heat getting to me, or perhaps it's the heat getting to them, or perhaps it's just awesome...but today while I was approaching a light, a dog started walking across the street at the crosswalk.  He was leashed and was accompanied by a man...a man who happened to be holding two leashes.  He was followed by another man who had a collar around his neck and was walking behind both the dog and the first man, and was holding a ball in his mouth.

Me:  "You see what I see?"

Big guy:  "Yup."

Me:  "OK, good...that was awesome, right?

Big guy:  Sighs and rolls eyes at his easily amused mom.

Now to have a conversation with him about whether we should call that second guy a "mog" or a "dan"...he's gonna love it!

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Friday, August 30, 2013

Cooked and Loaded

I'm not one to use autocorrect on my phone.  I turned that puppy off first thing.  It drove me nuts.  But...I do appreciate the funny stuff that comes of it.  Even when it's at the expense of one of my own kiddos.

Little guy:   "Can you start a slice of pizza cocking"

(ten seconds go by)

Little guy:   "OMG autocorrect"

Yup, no fun using a not-around-mom word in a text that will last forever.

And lucky for him I was already cooking something for everyone.

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Thursday, August 29, 2013

The Wonder Skort

It might seem like such a small thing, or at the minimum something that you'd say, "Duh!" to, but somehow I managed to forget about them.  Yup, I'm talking about the incredible invention...the skort.  I've had a scant few over the years, all of which were of that unprofessional length, for sure.  Well, except for that profession.  Anyway, I just received not one, but two skorts in the mail.  And day one of wearing was nothing short of life changing.

You see, the thing is it's all about my wonderful and amazing job.  As you know, I work with three- and four-year olds with disabilities.  I'm sitting on the floor, crawling a bit from here to there, helping kiddos move about, and falling somewhere on campus at least once a year because that's just how I roll...literally.

Anyway, I've been skirt phobic as I just know something awkward might happen and now that I'm reunited with skorts (professional length, thank you very much), my life is officially changed.  And I'm quite certain that now the world is a safer place for both my coworkers and students.

...that's a collective sigh of relief you just heard, I'm sure!

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Wednesday, August 28, 2013


Found out it's never too late to learn...about myself, that is.  I've got "help with homework" duty every weeknight from 5:00 - 7:00, and last night I ended up reading an article that was totally about me and my parenting style.  Most of our style these days, in fact.  I'm not one to like fitting into any sort of cliché sort of thing, particularly when it was a style that the author thought was ultimately a bit damaging, albeit widespread, but that's kind of how it went.

What was it?  It was overprotective parenting and its effects on the kiddos.  When I was a kid I was pretty much of a homebody, but I was always allowed to be out and around if I got the gumption up.  And when I did I'd disappear for hours on end.  I'd be at the creek down the hill getting filthy, being too scared to pick up crawdads, loving playing with all the frogs I found, and often not returning home until my mom went outside, stood in the street, and banged a gong until I got home.  Embarrassing much?  Uh, you bet!

My own kids got to explore creeks, too, but I was always there.  They picked up crawdads and frogs, but I'd make them wash up right quick.  They could go places, but I had to always know where they were, and once they entered sixth grade and got cell phones, I'd expect them to pick up if I called them. 

I felt guilty at first after reading the homework article and went to my "go to" excuse of "well, something could have happened to them!"  And as I experienced having two men (strangers) pull up next to me as I was walking home from elementary school and demand that I get in the car with them, and I had the good sense to run as fast as I could to the nearest house and bang on the door for help, I know sometimes things do happen to kids.

So...I think I need to take my kids out this weekend, drop them off at a sweet little creek, confiscate their phones, and insist that they get covered in mud and touch and set free at least five critters each.

...oops, I think I just got controlling again.

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Tuesday, August 27, 2013

Aging Backward Style

As I rode my bike home from work today I passed a lady, perhaps in her late sixties...and she had the bluest hair ever!  And I loved it.  Now it wasn't normal old lady blue hair, nope, this was fabulously electric blue.  And it got me thinking.  If we tend to age backward, as I hear we do, as we get toward our twilight years, why not age backward hair color wise.  You know, go through my rebellious teen (I was always kind, even if people assumed by my look that I wasn't) years again.

So here's my reverse of how it actually went the first time around.

• bleach hair almost white.
• dye hair blue
• dye hair pink
• shave head except for the front and have one gangly little tail protruding from the side
• shave hair into a mohawk
• perm hair curly rockabilly style
• dye hair auburn
• dye hair black
• bleach hair almost white
• get short spiky hair cut
• get hair cut like a boy
• spike just the top of my otherwise shoulder-length hair
• dye hair rainbow colors just for fun and then find out that food coloring is PERMANENT

Yup, there's my plan.  Oh, and I want to be one of those red hat ladies, too, you know, so I can weart the hat, I don't care about the meetings as much, and I'm pretty sure a red hat will go with anything.

Here's to all the cool "old" ladies out there!  You're my heroes!

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Monday, August 26, 2013

First Day of School

I love how people look at things differently.  It was the first day of school for all of us.  Big guy, first day of college.  Little guy, first day of high school.  Me, first day of my same bat place, same bat time teaching gig that I love ever so much.  And if we're asked to say one thing about our first day of school?  Well...

Little guy:  "I ate something weird in the cafeteria."

Me:  "I had so much fun...I played with kiddos all day!"

Big guy:  "Having good teachers makes such a difference in how well you can learn."

OK, now who's the most grown-up amongst the three of us? 

I dig it!

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Sunday, August 25, 2013

Wakey, Wakey!

We've been preparing for the start of the school year...sort of.  You know, things like going to bed a little earlier, waking up a little earlier.  I've been quite successful.  The kids not so much.  So here we are, the last day before school starts, and I wake the guys up.  Big guy?  Nope, no way.  Little guy?  Slowly, slowly, only because I tell him he has to get up to go with me to Costco to choose his school snacks or I'll be sending him with freeze dried broccoli and carrots.  So my zombie kid started moving.

We walked through the aisles..."I'm too sleepy to choose a snack."

We stopped by an end cap to wait for the main aisle to clear...and he ran into me because he was walking with his eyes closed.

We saw a teacher friend of mine...and he stood there swaying, silently, with his eyes at half mast while she and I chatted.

We got to the register...I gave him money for a Coke (yup, mom of the year here) and a slice of pizza...and he got it and lay his head on the table in the cafe area.

We got in the car...he leaned against the window and closed his eyes.

We passed a huge unused parking lot and I woke him up..."Too bad you're so sleepy, I totally would have stopped and let you try driving my car if you were awake."

Little guy:  "I'M AWAKE!!  I'M AWAKE!!"

Next time my sweet guy, next time...and now I know how to wake you up in nothing flat!

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Saturday, August 24, 2013

Canine Gratitude

I used to think it was just absolute luck that we had the most polite dog ever.  Each time we'd feed our dog, Scout, she'd pause, gaze at us with her beautiful brown eyes, and then proceed to eat her meal.  It was the most beautiful thing receiving such love and gratitude from this delightfully fuzzy creature of ours.

And then we got Hazel.  And she, too, pauses, gazing at us with her beautiful brown eyes, before she dives into the grub.

So now I'm wondering if it's just a dog thing...I dunno, but it is, without a doubt, a beautiful thing. 

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Friday, August 23, 2013

We must Factor in the Laziness...Apparently

I went into my kid's room, you know, just to see wassup?

I stood there looking his desk, at his chest of drawers, at his window sill.

Me:  "You have eight cups, four bowls, one plate, and a fork and a spoon.  What is up with that?"

Little guy:  "The laziness factor."

Me:  "Seriously?"

Little guy:  "Oh, but those two cups over there have been there for about three weeks."

Me:  "Are you saying they're not part of the laziness factor?"

Little guy:  "Uh, no...just that I've been lazy with them for longer."

...points for honesty, kid.

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Thursday, August 22, 2013

Mean Mom Alert!

Yup.  Tis true.  I'm officially a mean mom...again.

You see, I've officially stopped making food for my kid.  I know, sounds awful...but the thing is, nothing else was working.  The kid was assigned a summer reading project (personally, I think it's mean to assign a kid an assignment over the summer) and he won't read the book.  And it's a great book.  One of my favorites ever.

We've tried:

- no friends over
- no sleep overs
- no technology

And we've had no all.

So, today when he let me know that he was starving as soon as I got home from work, and I found out that he still hadn't read, well, I told him I was done cooking for him.

And did I create a passionate reader?  Well, no.  But I did create a kid who has since displayed an amazing ability to cook for himself.

Thinking that makes my parenting moment not a total fail, right?

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Wednesday, August 21, 2013

Take the Time to See what's Below

My dog and I have been wondering about something as we go for our nightly walks.  Every time we pass a particular area, it's like the grass, weeds, and all other plant life come to life.  They shake, rustle, and move about in a curiously alarming fashion that takes us both by surprise every time...even though by now we should expect it.

Well, the other night I decided I was going to figure out exactly what was going on.  So, Hazel and I walked our normal path, heard the first hints of movement, and stopped in our tracks.  We waited for a surprisingly short amount of time and suddenly mice were everywhere!  They ran in front of us, behind us, around us, back and forth into the was AWESOME!

So now it's our routine to walk very slowly through this area taking the time to gaze as these marvelous little creatures as the emerge from and dive into their burrows, as they chew on bits of grass, and as they do what I'm quite sure is simply play.

We love 'em!

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Tuesday, August 20, 2013


After an absolutely wonderful, divine, purely delicious summer break, I headed back to work today.  And it was also wonderful, divine, and purely delicious (especially the amazing breakfast tacos!!).  As with all school years I come up with goals for myself.  Typically they're about improving as a teacher, a co-worker, or some such thing.  This year?  My goal will hopefully lead to an improvement as a relaxed person, a wife, a mom...which, of course, means I'll be a better teacher, right?

Anyway, this year my goal commitment (because I really, really mean it) is to never, ever check my work email unless I'm at work.  You see, I've had this nutty habit over the years of logging in during my time, and taking care of business.  And upon looking back, I can't imagine that it helped with anything even though that's the direction my heart and intent were going.

Now, over the years I've quit many, many things that I've set out to rid myself of.  And I'm a cold turkey kind of girl.  My successes you ask?

• quit eating red meat as a fifteen-year old.
• quit smoking as a seventeen-year-old (seriously, the cost of a pack went to a way!).
• quit biting my nails (numerous times over the years, but it's been a really long time now).
• quit chewing gum (again, numerous times, but I'm "clean" now).
• quit all caffeine (coffee, tea, chocolate) last December.
• quit turning on the TV...since 2009.

So, I can do it, right?

My failures you ask?

• quit using bad words (I'd be successful if bad words weren't just the right thing on rare occasions...never at work).
• quit being snarky (my personality simply dictates that I cannot quit this one).

OK, so perhaps I only have a 50% chance of success, but this girl's gonna give being unplugged her all, people.  I'm taking my "time off" back.

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Monday, August 19, 2013

Medium of Choice

Artists come in all shapes and sizes, have every different muse under the sun, and choose from a myriad of natural and man-made mediums to produce their work.  Me?  I like ink and watercolor.  But, hey, that's just me.  My little guy?  Well...

Little guy in the car on the way somewhere today:  "I think I'm gonna draw a picture on your window with my toe juice."

OK, ew!  And who knew toes had juice?  And who wanted to know?!?!

Job for the kid tonight?  Cleaning mom's windshield...that's one piece of art that is not going to end up on the fridge.

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Sunday, August 18, 2013

Sentimental Sunday

Been having a sentimental Sunday 'round here.  With my big guy entering college and my little guy starting high school next week, as in just seven days from now, I keep thinking of the little boogers they once I look up at them now towering over me...and I'm absolutely confident that they'll each be brilliant and amazing in their owns way.  I mean with a history of such deep thoughts, how could they not be?

My little guy who once inquired, "Was [big guy] zero when he came out of your privates?"

and..."Dump trucks must cuss a lot because of all the beeping sounds."

My big guy who had a great idea after receiving his glasses prescription for a weakness in only one eye, "Can I just get a unicle?"

and..."I ate a big, big, big, big booger in the bathroom!!"

I'm so excited for them!  And can't wait to hear what they say next!

Why yes, of course, this is supposed to be me and my boys.
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Saturday, August 17, 2013

It must be almost back to school time...

...because the nightmares have begun.  Now you all know I LOVE my job.  It's just one of those things I do.  I did it as a kid, too.  You know, showing up to school naked or just in PJs, not knowing about the HUGE test...stuff like that.

Well, last night's had me a bit shaken when I woke up.  You see, I showed up to work for my job, which had suddenly switched from working with three and four-year-olds to working with high school students (not a slight against them, I live with one, for Pete's sake!).  And they were BIGGER than I am.  Much bigger!  And I didn't really have a classroom, more of an industrial utility closet with pipes and conduit going everywhere, steam being released at irregular intervals, very dark and creepy.  And no one had given me any info on what my individual students' goals were.  And somehow all the parents managed to be able to drop off their children yet my assistant found herself locked out.  And the only curriculum like material I could find was incomplete game sets of Chutes and Ladders and Hi-ho!  Cherry-O.  And so we played them.  And then my assistant showed up.  And then I woke up.

And all was well...whew!

P.S.  Maybe someday I will get the privilege of working with high schoolers.  But, hey, I'd really like to have a real classroom and some real supplies.  Oh, and could they please be shorter than I am?

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Friday, August 16, 2013

Gutless Love

My dogs are experts at the fine art of gutless love.  The thing is, we keep giving them dog toys.  Ones we buy (rarely), ones our kids have tired of (usually, but not lately), and ones we get for free (swag rocks!).

Both Hazel and Scout will lovingly carry these wee little stuffed animals around...everywhere.  They get them soggy and you can bet there are high odds they'll drop the dripping critters right on your bare feet.  Ew!

Anyway, after delicately carrying around these little prizes of theirs for quite some time, something overcomes them.  They decide to pick on one little spot, create a hole, and gut the little Snoopy, or Octopus, or Long Dog, or...or...or....  (Yes, we do name our dogs' toys!)

But do we throw out the skins left behind?  Nope, we do not.  Our dogs love those's like they've finally gotten their toys in the perfect form.  And they carry them around delicately, getting them quite slobbery, and always...always end up dropping them on our bare feet.

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Thursday, August 15, 2013

The Wait

Me:  "Oh, yay...just in time for the red light," I proclaimed, rather sarcastically, as we approached one of those intersections whose light sequence has you waiting for about five minutes if you get there at just the right time.

Little guy:  "'Yay'?"

And then the scrappiest little grackel flew in front of my car, landed on the crosswalk, and proceeded to walk all the way across the street.  On the crosswalk!

Me:  "That was the coolest thing ever!"

Little guy:  "That was awesome!"

And we just sat there in awe, smiling broadly, looking at the most charming little bird ever.

So, yes, YAY!

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Wednesday, August 14, 2013

My Fabulous Summer

You know, I usually start my summer break sick, sick, sick...cooties from my precious students combined with exhaustion make for a perfect petri dish of funk.  But this year I somehow managed to earn a "get out of jail free" card and was off and out of town with nary a sniffle.  It rawked!

But...skip forward about nine weeks, and I've been sick as a dawg for three days now.  Officially hosting a pity party now.  And I go back to work next week!  So even though I've had what has likely been my most amazing summer break ever, I'm in panic mode because there's still more I want to do!

I suppose there's a lesson in all of this, a reminder for me to focus on the fabulousness and assume that this illness is a "break" of sorts.  So, here goes....

My Fabulous Summer (in no particular order)

• was in a commercial with my kid.
• saw tons of friends...from long ago and more recent.
• went out of town three times.
• was an extra in a TV show.
• painted, painted, painted...and wrote, wrote, wrote.
• renovated our kitchen (we did almost all the work).
• went on many Home Depot and Lowe's dates with my husband thanks to the renovation.
• rode my bike and daydreamed around the lake so many times.
• hung out with all different members of my family.
• watched tons of movies.
• went through all my clothes and got rid of tons.
• did the same thing with my little guy's clothes.
• prepared tons of my work for selling online.
• sold some of my paintings.
• started some ideas for a children's picture book.
• relaxed a lot!

OK, I feel better now...but I'd still really, really, really like to feel better by tomorrow.  Girl still wants to play!

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Tuesday, August 13, 2013

I'm a Walking Billboard

Not in the way that you see those serious bicyclists all decked out with brand names and sponsors on every inch of their outfits.  And not in the way that some folks that are way more concerned about such things than I make sure they have some brand name of such-and-such plastered across their chest...or bootie.  And not even in the way that millions of children have popular characters on their shirts, PJs and such.

Nope, I'm a walking...I should say "running" billboard in that I've totally been a Nyquil ad the last couple of days.  Perhaps even a Benadryl ad.  And toss a little Advil in there just for fun.

Yup, runny nose, achy, sore throat, coughing, sneezing, exhausted me!

So, hey, I may be willing to make a deal with the about this?  I'll happily wear outfits showcasing your awesome products for three months straight if you'll actually heal me from this cold before that seven day common cold shelf life.

Sigh...happily I'm having blissful, infection-driven "Beverly Hillbillies" memories of Granny discovering the cure to the common cold.  If memory serves correct, it was some sort of moonshine, and she guaranteed it'd work within a week of using it.  Loved that Granny!

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Monday, August 12, 2013

Butterfly Bliss and Cricket Crunch

Yesterday we hung out with butterflies.  TONS of them.  Hundreds upon hundreds, I'm sure.  Big ones, little ones, colorful ones, "drab" ones, fast ones, slow ones...I swear there's a missing Dr. Seuss book about this place, it's crying out for kiddo poetry.

...perhaps that's to be my next task.

Anyway, it was fabulous.  And even my fourteen-year-old little guy was totally into it...taking photos, wishing they'd land on him, begging butterflies to open their beautiful wings, strike a pose, and say, "Cheese!"

It was a wonder-filled time, and as we walked out of the what must have been a five story terrarium, the little guy happened upon a vending machine.  And as he's always hungry, he asked for money.  And as he soon saw that it was flavored crickets in the machine, he got even more excited.  And down the hatch they went.

6 crickets (a tidy 1.4 grams)
sour cream and onion flavoring
9 calories

Little guy:  "I'm still hungry, mom."

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Sunday, August 11, 2013

The "Not my Dollar" no longer my dollar.  I had carried it around in my car for about a month or so hoping to run into someone who needed it, asked for it, that it really belonged to (see my previous blog about the dollar).  And, oddly enough, during this time I was never in the position (when in my car) to hand it over.  I either didn't see anyone, was in the wrong lane, was driving quickly by, or something.

The other day I did finally find myself at a light directly next to a gentleman with a very dog-eared sign stating, "Just need a leg up."  I held my dollar up, he came to my car, I handed it to him, he mumbled a "thanks", and then he proceeded to walk down the line of cars, what I imagined he'd been and would be doing for some hours.

Now, his reaction to the "transaction" didn't surprise me at all, but I found that mine did.  For some reason over the past month I had built up in my head that it would feel good to let go of this dollar that was not my own.  And I have to say that it absolutely did not make me feel good, but it did make me feel.  I live a chunk of my life with my head buried in the sand as, admittedly, I simply cannot handle the anguish of the unknown strangers, the tragedies that unfold in this world every day, the injustice to our fellow humans and the animals of this world...and this "transaction" brought it home for me in that moment.  The tiniest dip of my toe into the pool of life that another experiences...and when the light turned green I was thrust back into my own life, almost as though nothing had happened...almost.

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Saturday, August 10, 2013

Cat Scratch Fever

My cat...I love the guy dearly, seriously I do.  He's the perfect cat.  Aloof, then affectionate, then aloof once again.  Always taking pleasure in my giving him pleasure and somehow manipulating me into believing that giving him pleasure actually gives me pleasure.  Amazing and wonder filled, really.

Anyway...he's got this funny routine lately.  I wake up, he meows at the back door to come in after a night of doing whatever cats do outside all night, he comes in, completely ignores me, goes to his food, eats a brief snack, and then disappears.  Dunno where he goes.  But...I groggily go to my computer, open it up, turn to get my water that I'd put on the bar, turn back around, and that cat of mine has silently positioned himself in the few inches between my computer and the edge of the table, quite effectively preventing me from using said computer.  He yawns, he acts casual, he elongates his body subtly giving me a menu of good spots to scratch.

And I do.  And it makes me feel fabulous!

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Friday, August 9, 2013

Silver Linings

Picked my kid up from a sleep over early this afternoon.  He looked blissfully tired...and a bit snarfly, a little heavy on the booger side, stuffed up.

As we drove home I noticed him leaning to the side just a bit.  That lean that makes me think I should roll my window down sooner than later.  That lean that always seems to make my kid ever so happy.

Little guy:  "This is the best thing ever!"

Me:  "What?"  I go ahead and begin rolling my window down.

Little guy:  "I can totally stink up your car and I don't even have to smell it!"

That's my guy, cup always half full, always finding the silver lining...even to mocos verdes.

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Thursday, August 8, 2013

To the Batcave!

I can finally check off something that I've been procrastinating since 2012.  The thing is, at the school where I work there's a small outdoor hallway that has been dubbed The Bat Cave.  Students, parents, and staff have created amazing pieces of art on panels of wood.  The artist purchases the panel for about twenty dollars (I can't remember exactly, it was so long ago!) and then goes nuts making something bat-ish.  There are mosaic bats, mixed media bats, painted bats, and more.  It's just one little piece of our school that represents the abundance of art appreciation that is present.  Seriously, the campus has to be one of the most beautiful public elementary schools evah!

Anyway, after purchasing my wood panel sometime in December of last year, here's my contribution...finally!  Excited to see my little silver bat amongst its cave-dwelling friends.

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Wednesday, August 7, 2013

Between a Rock and a Hard Place

Yup, the story of my mammogram this afternoon.  What's not to love about the procedure, right?

•  There's the spectacularly lovely open-in-the-front garment.

•  You pretty much always show up a little stinky because there's "no deodorant allowed".

•  The folks who do the procedure have a delightful way of saying "relax" at the most unrelaxing times.

•  You get to grip "lightly" onto a rail...and soon realize that you have a white knuckle death grip on the thing.

•  The technician looks at your scans during the procedure yet has the willpower to remain silent and give up absolutely no scoop about the results...even though you know they know.

•  Oh, and of course there's the "between a rock and a hard place" personal least favorite.

Sigh...Checking that off for the year! 

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Tuesday, August 6, 2013

These Boots were Made for Walkin'

Well, at least my boots are.  And lucky duck that I am, my sweet mom bought me an awesome pair of new-to-me cowboy boots at a hip thrift store today.  I was all excited to talk about them when I picked up my little guy this afternoon.

Me:  "I got some new cowboy boots today."

Little guy:  "That's cool."

Me:  "Do you ever want some boots?"

Little guy:  "I don't like boots."

Me:  "Why?!?!  What's not to like about cowboy boots?"

Little guy:  "I can't actually walk in them."

Me:  "Oh, I probably trained you to think that when you were a little boy."

Little guy:  "What?"

Me:  "Yeah, when I needed to get you to slow down I'd just put cowboy boots on your feet.  You loved them and didn't even notice how much they inhibited your movement."

Little guy:  "That was mean, mom."

Me:  "Hey, that's what you get for starting walking at only eight months old.  Now that was mean, dude.  Your mama was tired!"

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Monday, August 5, 2013

Bottoms up...and out in OUTA HERE!

Yes, my bikini bottoms did finally arrive.  And I must absolutely positively be getting old because, oh my goodness, there was not enough material in the darn things.  Mind you, technically they "fit", but there's no way I could wear them in public...or private for that matter.

So I put them back in their shipping bag, made sure to keep the receipt, and felt a little defeated in the bikini bottoms shopping area.

But, being the trooper that I try to be, I made my way to the bedroom and pulled out the contents of my swim suit drawer.  In the bottom I found three bikini bottoms that had ample material, did more than enough coverage-wise, and were not threadbare at all!

Next time you seem a forty-six year old chick at the pool rockin' her granny panty bikini bottoms...yup, it'll be me!

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Sunday, August 4, 2013

Stop and Smell the Bats

OK, perhaps not literally smell them, that could be very dangerous, but when you're supposed to stop and smell the roses.

Well, today I stopped and smelled the bats.  I woke up super early (summer schedule-wise) and found myself on the Congress Bridge at 7:25 this morning.  Turns out it was just the right time to show up and experience all the bats coming home after a long night of flying and feeding.  And it was amazing!  I've seen them stream out when they're departing, but that had nothing on this.  "Why?" you ask?

•  No crowds...just little old me and a scant number of runners who seemed oblivious to the wonder they were ignoring.

•  The bats flew in at seemingly kamikaze speeds and managed to dart directly into their specific slit under the bridge.  Wowza!

•  The air was fresher...something lovely about morning air over the river with very little traffic exhaust smell and bats who had likely done their business elsewhere.

•  It was over 20° cooler than when you watch in the evening.

I recommend it highly.  And while you're out there first thing some morning, be sure to wish all the homeless folks a cheerful, "Good morning."  Does your and their hearts good.

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And here's something batty that I've been working on.  I'm creating a piece to go in the "Bat Cave" at the elementary school where I work.  The cave is filled with many other pieces created by artists that didn't procrastinate as much as I.  Painting will commence later this week!  And I've said now I'm accountable.

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Saturday, August 3, 2013


Sometimes I overshare.  It's a burden to friends and family and possibly straight-up obnoxious to strangers.  Sigh....

Like the other day when the Fedex lady showed up with a package.  I got super excited, as I'm apt to do if a brown cardboard box or a large gray bag arrives.

Me:  "Oh, yay!"  I'm so glad you're here!  That's the bikini bottoms I ordered to replace the ones I have on right now that I totally worn out!"

 Nice Fedex Lady:  "Oh, OK."  And then she giggled politely and pretty much sprinted back to her truck.

I didn't care...I had my new bikini bottoms and I would be ashamed no more by my tattered suit.

Only it wasn't my bikini bottoms, it was swim trunks I'd ordered for my kid.  So off I went, disappointed, in my threadbare duds.

And what happened at the pool that night?  My favorite eleven year old in the whole wide world looked at me and said, as I walked by the pool, "This isn't happening!!!"  And then he covered his eyes.

Yup, this mama is lookin' gooooooood!

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Friday, August 2, 2013

Over the Top

We had a crowd of teenage boys here simply seems to be our way.  And I love it!  Well, mostly that is, until I go to the bathroom first thing and discover that our toilet paper has been put on the wrong way.  In my opinion, there's over the top and there's wrong way.  There's only one good choice.

Well, I don't think it was one of my own children who did it as they're more likely to just put the new roll on top of the empty roll rather than actually do all the work of installing it.  So, it has to be one of the teenage guests we had.

At first I just rolled my eyes and pulled the paper from below (no, I didn't fix it...I'm trying really hard to resist my corrective instincts), and then I began to really think about it.  I mean, do I actually want my children to be hanging out with these children of errant T.P. ways?  What on earth must be happening in their homes?  How are they being raised, by golly?!?!  Dare I invite the likes of them over...ever?!?!

And then I took a deep breath, flushed, washed my hands, did a quick mental cleanse, and left the room.

They are pretty darn fabulous kids in spite of this one issue, after all.

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Thursday, August 1, 2013

Home Sweet Home

In spite of the fact that we have a fabulous clothesline that I love and adore, we end up using our dryer a lot.  Seriously, it's a surprising amount of laundry I do and it often builds up into mounds of clothing and towels...luckily mostly clean.

Well, this morning I got a wild hair and decided that our dryer, that serves us so well with nary a complaint, deserved a bit of T.L.C.  So, I YouTubed a bunch of "care and feeding of your dryer" type videos and found one that suggested a delinting.  Off went the kickplate.  Off went some whatchamacallit cover thing.  And then I found out where all the dryer lint that manages to escape the lint catcher goes to live out its life in bliss.  There was the hugest ball of tough, cohesive lint I'd ever seen!  I picked that sucker up, briefly considered dissecting as if it were a huge owl pellet, and then gingerly carried it to the trash...after I picked out the $1.73 that was in it.


Hey, I wouldn't be me without a little picking!

Home Sweet (and safer) Home

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