Monday, December 31, 2012

Original Packaging

We bought a new coffee maker a few weeks ago.  Turns out it has a spitting problem.  Not just a little spit as it clears out its pipes, no, this is more of a long, drawn out drool.  Anyway, we had to take it back for a redo.  While we were putting it back into its original packaging (as was required), our little kid started howling and making all kinds of unnecessary, and quite annoying, sounds.  Really, I'm all for a good howl, but the kid spontaneously and frequently howls, whistles, chirps, yodels, sings opera, etc. at a moment's notice, for no particular reason, causing all those around him to startle and then begin twitching until they determine what, exactly, has gotten their brickles up.

Anyway, this time his parents did a little mumbling under their breath.

Dave:  "Did you ever think when we had them that they'd be so annoying?"

Me:  "No, and we don't have the original packaging any more, so we can't return them."

In all seriousness, folks, 'tis true...we tossed out their placentas about ten years ago when we lost power for several days after a storm.  Sadly, placentas don't keep well under such conditions.

So, why did we have their placentas in the freezer?

Because we had home births with each kiddo.  Midwives leave the placenta for you to do whatever you want with them.

What were we going to do with them?

Well, I was a hippie mom, so my plan was, I admit it, to bring out my inner animal and possibly eat it.  No small thing for someone who doesn't eat mammals and such.

So, did I eat it?

Ew, no, gross!!

P.S.  We didn't so much "toss" the placentas so much as bury them in the back yard alongside all the other critters who have left us over the years.

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