Friday, March 23, 2012

"You're Fired!"...um, twice!

It's a funny thing.  I've been fired twice in my entire life, it was by the same company, and yet those words were never uttered.  I was reminded of it tonight when I took my kiddos through the drive through of a very Austin sandwich shop of which I speak.

So, how do you fire someone without actually telling them they're fired?  Well, the strategy used on me was putting me in a place of non-existence.  Yes, in their eyes I ceased to "be".  I remember showing up to see when I was scheduled to work and I was, mysteriously, not on the hand-written schedule sheet.  No one ever knew anything...I was greeted by a chorus of "I dunno" and some reluctance to even talk to me as though I had some "newly fired" disease or something.

The first time I was fired it turned out that the day and night manager had actually framed me.  They were coming in on my shifts and stealing money from the register.  My shifts.  Freaky, right?  I was actually framed by criminal master minds.  OK, in reality they were stupid druggies, but still, they managed to get me fired.  Anyway, I got an attorney...a free one available at the university who actually told me there was nothing they could do, too bad, so sad.  But I rode my bike to the owners' office and plead my case (and told them I had seen an attorney, of course...I didn't lie, I had seen an attorney!).  I actually fought to get my sandwich making job back.  For reals, though people, I loved that job.  Anyway, just as mysteriously, the next week I was back on the schedule and there were new day and night managers hired.

The other time?  Well, it was for having a pierced nose with a ring in it.  Now-a-days when you hit this sandwich shop I swear it must be a requirement that you either have those big stretch-your-earlobe things in or have at least two face piercings to even apply for a job.  No doubt about it, 25 years ago I was WAY ahead of my time.  Awesome, right?


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