In case you didn't know already, I'm an awesome daughter. Yes, I did go by each of my parents' homes this evening, for 45 minutes each, spent some quality time, and then rushed myself home. I have a huge mountain of laundry that needs some serious attention, don't ya know. And what better way to celebrate Mother's Day than washing my children's clothes, right? I pull into the driveway, get out, and my little guy greets me at the carport door.
Little dude: "You're not going to want to come in here, mom."
I follow him in, against my better judgment, and gadzooks! He was right! I felt like gagging instantly and reflexively reached for the inhaler that I have neglected to refill for about a year now.
Me: "What happened?!?!"
Little dude: "Axe wars."
OK, so here's my list of teenager scents from best (unoffensive) to worst (utterly and completely offensive).
1. freshly cleaned boy in a freshly cleaned towel
2. boy about an hour after he's applied (correctly) deodorant
3. boy who has noticed he's got a bit of a smell and gives himself a squirt of Axe
4. boy who forgot his deodorant that morning and doesn't care how he smells at the end of the day
5. boy the next morning after #4 with no bathing intervention
6. boy from #5 liberally spraying himself with Axe to cover the B.O.
7. two boys battling all over the house with Axe spray while mom and dad are gone
I think the Axe needs to be axed.